THE GRANDFATHER CLOCK

A man got stuck inside a grandfather clock at the public library. He had just been sitting there minding his own business, on a rocking chair, reading Baudelaire, when all the sudden he was stuck. Had he shrunk? Did the clock grow bigger? He felt essentially the same, except for a tension in his neck and a growing claustrophobia. He began to count the numbers on the clock to remain sane: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, who was he kidding? He was doomed. Destined to spend the rest of his life inside of an old clock. Then the clock struck midnight. Ring-Ring-Ring! The man jolted awake. The clock was nowhere to be found. He wasn’t even at the library anymore. In fact, he was sitting next to a blank canvas with an easel and brush. He began to paint an old grandfather clock..

MY BATTLE WITH THE ENGLISH DRAGON

I laid down to sleep after a long day of painting apartment buildings for $25 an hour. That’s when I started dreaming about a medieval dragon. It was an English dragon, no doubt, from childhood years of too many fairy tales. I was dressed in the skin of a jaguar I had hunted. I’m not an Englishman. I’m a Mexican from Southern California. I chased the dragon on my motorcycle. I chased it along Pacific Coast Highway. The dragon was trying to destroy the west coast. In the dream, I’m a Jaguar Knight mixed with a Conquistador, but I’m fighting a scarlet dragon. The dragon looks like it belongs in an English folk tale, or an epic poem written by a hermit. Anyway, I battle the dragon with my macuahuitl, but since I’m Mestizo, I also have a sword and shield. I slay the dragon with a swift strike to the heart. It falls onto the sand and is eventually pulled into the sea. I ride my motorcycle home as the moonlight sparkles on the ocean.

LIZARD MAN

Although my body is that of a human, I have the head of a lizard. My lizard tongue is something of a show for people, but I’ve learned to embrace it. I rather like having a lizard head. Something different. Going against the mainstream. I listen to punk rock music; so, it fits the aesthetic. I work as an art teacher, online. When the students first see me, they are polite for the most part. But I hear the whispers and giggles in the background. Can’t deny it doesn’t hurt a little. But pain makes you stronger. The best part about having a lizard head is definitely the superior vision. I can see all the beauty in the details; lilacs blooming in the spring.

Double Yolk extends gratitude to Pithead Chapel, which first featured “Lizard Man”.